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Post by CBee on Feb 3, 2004 22:45:12 GMT
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Post by Not Karl on Feb 3, 2004 22:46:08 GMT
Dwayne Dibbly he makes the odd appearance in Red Dwarf... sort of the Kats alter ego! ahh, thanks for c;earin that p for me, i thought they were takin the piss outta someone, but now know for real,cheers
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Post by feedme on Feb 3, 2004 22:52:27 GMT
ahh i see this place is getting on famously
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Post by Jock on Feb 3, 2004 22:54:57 GMT
This could fast become a Red Dwarf piccy thred!!
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Post by CBee on Feb 3, 2004 22:55:34 GMT
What a good idea!!!!!
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Post by feedme on Feb 3, 2004 22:56:38 GMT
What a good idea!!!!! ...i take thats a que to me to change the title is it
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Post by Jock on Feb 3, 2004 23:00:29 GMT
mmmm Kochanski... shes far better looking than the first one!
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Post by CBee on Feb 3, 2004 23:00:40 GMT
Nah, the thread wouldn't be the same without all the piccys of Grant!!!
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Post by CBee on Feb 3, 2004 23:06:01 GMT
And another Ace Rimmer one...
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Post by Jock on Feb 3, 2004 23:09:56 GMT
Theres old Rimmsy again!!!
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Post by CBee on Feb 3, 2004 23:17:48 GMT
To balance it, here's some Phoenix nights
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Post by Jock on Feb 3, 2004 23:21:29 GMT
Heres another classic!...
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Post by CBee on Feb 3, 2004 23:25:11 GMT
Oh, I remember that! Wahey!!!
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Post by Jock on Feb 3, 2004 23:26:59 GMT
ahh and who culd forget.... Blackadder goes forth was my favourite series!!
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Post by CBee on Feb 3, 2004 23:30:54 GMT
I preferred Blackadder II, although they're all brilliant. "There are two things you must know about the wise woman. Firstly, she is a woman. Secondly, she is..." "Wise?" "Oh, d'you know her then?" "No, just a wild stab in the dark. Which is incidentally what you will be getting if you're not much more helpful."
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Post by feedme on Feb 3, 2004 23:31:42 GMT
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Post by Jock on Feb 3, 2004 23:38:09 GMT
Blackadder: Baldrick, what are you doing out there? Baldrick: I'm carving something on this bullet sir. Blackadder: What are you carving? Baldrick: I'm carving "Baldrick", sir. Blackadder: Why? Baldrick: It's a cunning plan actually. Blackadder: Of course it is. Baldrick: You see, you know they say that somewhere there's a bullet with your name on it? Blackadder: Yes? Baldrick: Well, I thought if I owned the bullet with my name on it, I'd never get hit by it, ''cos I won't ever shoot myself. Blackadder: Oh, shame. Baldrick: And, the chances of there being two bullets with my name on them are very small indeed. Blackadder: That's not the only thing around here that's "very small indeed". Your brain for example, is so minute, Baldrick, that if a hungry cannibal cracked your head open there wouldn't be enough inside to cover a small water-biscuit.
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Post by feedme on Feb 3, 2004 23:39:47 GMT
Basil Fawlty: Is something wrong? 4th German: Will you please stop talking about the war? Basil Fawlty: Me? You started it. 4th German: We did not. Basil Fawlty: Yes you did, you invaded Poland.
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Post by Jock on Feb 3, 2004 23:41:31 GMT
George: I spy with my little eye (he looks behind his shoulder and sees a
mug) something beginning with `M'.
Baldrick: Erm...
George: (encouraging) MMM...
Baldrick: Erm...
George: (encouraging) MMM... (he bobs his head down to within inches of the
mug a few times)
Baldrick: Mmm...
(this carries on for a while)
George: MMMuh... (he picks up the mug and holds it in front of him)
Baldrick: Mmm...
Edmund: (wishing he could read his book in peace; can't stand this carrying
on any longer; shouts) MUG!!!
George: Oh, I say, well done, sir. Your turn.
Edmund: I spy with my bored little eye something beginning with `T'.
Baldrick: Breakfast!
Edmund: What?
Baldrick: My breakfast always begins with tea, and I have a little sausage,
and a egg with some little soldiers.
Edmund: Baldrick, when I said it begins with `T', I was talking about a letter.
Baldrick: Nah, it never begins with a letter; the postman don't come 'til
10.30.
Edmund: I can't go on with this. (stands) George, take over.
George: All right, sir. Erm, I spy with my litle eye something beginning
with `R'.
Baldrick: (raises his arm, even though he's the only one playing now) Army!
Edmund: For God's sake, Baldrick! `Army' starts with an `A'. He's looking for
something that starts with an `R'. RRRrrrrr!
Baldrick: Motorbike!
Edmund: What?
Baldrick: A motorbike starts with a `RRRRRrrrrrrrrrm! RRRRRRrrrrrrrrrr--'
Edmund: All right, right, right, right. My turn again. What begins with `Come
here' and ends with `Ow'?
Baldrick: I don't know.
Edmund: Come here.
(Baldrick moves closer to Edmund; Edmund punches Baldrick in the face)
Baldrick: Ow! (falls to the ground)
Edmund: Well done.
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Post by feedme on Feb 3, 2004 23:45:56 GMT
Basil Fawlty: May I help you, madam? Mrs. Richards: Are you the manager? Basil Fawlty: I am the *owner*. Mrs. Richards: What? Basil Fawlty: I am the owner. Mrs. Richards: I want to speak to the manager. Basil Fawlty: [impatiently] I am the manager, too. Mrs. Richards: What? Basil Fawlty: I am the manager *as well*. Manuel: [confirming Basil's identity] Manajer, him manajer. Mrs. Richards: Oh. You're Watt. Basil Fawlty: [confused] I'm the manager. Mrs. Richards: What? Basil Fawlty: I'm the manager. Mrs. Richards: Yes, I know, you've just told me; what's the matter with you? Now listen to me. I specifically requested a bath for my room. When I pay for a bath, I expect to get a bath. Basil Fawlty: You've *got* a bath. Mrs. Richards: I'm not paying seventeen-pounds-fifty per night plus VAT for a room without a bath. Basil Fawlty: [indicating private bath in adjoining room] There is your bath. Mrs. Richards: You call that a bath? It's not big enough to drown a mouse. It's disgraceful. Basil Fawlty: [sotto voice] I wish you were a mouse; I'd show you. Mrs. Richards: [standing next to the window] And another thing: I asked for a room with a view. Basil Fawlty: [aside to Manuel] Deaf, mad, *and* blind. [to Mrs. Richards as he makes a show of inspecting the view] Basil Fawlty: This is the view as far as I can remember... Yes... Yes, this is it. Mrs. Richards: When I pay for a view, I expect to see something more interesting than that. Basil Fawlty: That is Torquay, madam. Mrs. Richards: Well, that's not good enough. Basil Fawlty: Well, might I ask what you expected to see out of a Torquay hotel bedroom window? Sydney Opera House, perhaps? The hanging gardens of Babylon? Herds of wildebeest sweeping majestically... Mrs. Richards: Don't be ridiculous. I expect to be able to see the sea. Basil Fawlty: You *can* see the sea. It's over there between the land and the sky. Mrs. Richards: I'd need a telescope to see that. Basil Fawlty: Well, might I suggest you move to a hotel closer to the sea. [sotto voice] Basil Fawlty: Or preferably in it. Mrs. Richards: Now listen to me. I'm not satisfied, but I've decided to stay here. However, I shall expect a reduction. Basil Fawlty: Why? Because Krakatoa's not erupting at the moment, or... Mrs. Richards: No. Because the room is cold, the bath is too small, the view is invisible, and the radio doesn't work. Basil Fawlty: No, the radio works. [sotto voice] Basil Fawlty: You don't. Mrs. Richards: What? Basil Fawlty: But I can fix it, you see. [sotto voice] Basil Fawlty: You scabby old bat. [Turns up the in-wall radio full blast to prove it works. Manuel jams his hands over his ears] Basil Fawlty: [shutting it off] I think we got something then. Mrs. Richards: What? Basil Fawlty: [louder] I think we got something then. Mrs. Richards: What are you doing? Manuel: [still with hands tightly over ears] QUÉ?
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Basil Fawlty: This is typical. Absolutely typical... of the kind of... [shouting] Basil Fawlty: ARSE I have to put up with from you people. You ponce in here expecting to be waited on hand and foot, while I'm trying to run a hotel here. Have you any idea of how much there is to do? Do you ever think of that? Of course not, you're all too busy sticking your noses into every corner, poking around for things to complain about, aren't you? Well let me tell you something -- this is exactly how Nazi Germany started. A lot of layabouts with nothing better to do than to cause trouble. Well I've had fifteen years of pandering to the likes of you, and I've had enough. I've had it. Come on, pack your bags and get out.
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